Armen the Toolman 1L

I spent almost every second of yesterday moving furniture around and cleaning sh...stuff because my parents, in their eternal wisdom, chose OUR spring break to order new furniture and replace the carpet. As I type this, my forearms are still in pain, and the splinter under the nail of my right ring finger pleasures me until I climax.

In my anger and irritation I may have told my parents that I might as well drop out of law school to become a carpenter or something. Upon deliberation, however, I'd much rather be the lawyer suing the jackass (also me) who installed an extra-high threshold under the door that's ripe for tripping even quadropeds.