Ballad of the Landlord

Since everyone seems to be in a "ohmagosh I need to find a new apartment/subletter/alien spaceship" kind of mood, I thought I'd post one of my favorite poems of all time.

Ballad of the Landlord
Langston Hughes

Landlord, landlord,
My roof has sprung a leak.
Don't you 'member I told you about it
Way last week?

Landlord, Landlord,
These steps is broken down...
When you come up youself
It's a wonder you don't fall down.

Ten Bucks you say I owe you?
Ten Bucks you say is due?
Well, that's Ten Bucks more'n I'll pay you
Till you fix this house up new.

What? You gonna get eviction orders?
You gonna cut off my heat?
You gonna take my furntirue and
Throw it in the Street

Um-huh! You talking high and mighty.
Talk on--till you get through.
You ain't gonna be able to say a word
If I land my fist on you.

Police! Police!
Come and get this man!
He's trying to ruin the government
And overturn the land!

Copper's whistle!
Patrol bell!
Arrest.

Precintnt Station.
Iron cell.
Headlines in press:

MAN THREATENS LANDLORD
TENANT HELD NO BAIL
JUDGE GIVES NEGRO 90 DAYS IN COUNTY JAIL.