Saturday, December 17, 2005

5 Indonesian Made Gold Rings

The AP via Yahoo has a report on protesters challenging Walmart's use of "Happy Holidays" instead of "Merry Christmas." The gem of the story was this:
About 50 protesters took part in Saturday's demonstration, organized by religious leaders. Dick Otterstad of the Church of the Divide donned a Santa Claus costume and greeted shoppers with the message: Don't forget about the meaning of Christmas.

Umm, a guy named Dick in a Santa suit protesting a store that is destroying the lives of god (and you may insert whatever you belive in here, if anything) knows how many people for its use of "Happy Holidays" is supposed to remind me of the TRUE meaning of Christmas? Santa suit!!! True meaning of Christmas!!!


Anonymous Anonymous said...

Everyone knows that Jesus was born on Dec 25, and Santa had come the night before (after the Yule log finished burning) and put gifts from Wal-Mart under a Douglas Fir tree. Jesus himself would have hated "happy holidays," because he really was all about focusing attention on himself and not wanting to wish his fellow humans well, regardless of creed. Oh yeah, and Jesus was fair-skinned, blond, blue-eyed, and meant everything he said literally. You got a problem with that?

Merry Christmas, even to you non-believers.

12/17/2005 9:47 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Does anyone have a link to the original South Park pilot that featured the big Jesus v. Santa fight? That's the true meaning of Xmas.

12/17/2005 11:09 PM  
Anonymous je ne sais rien said...

merry christmas, happy hanukkah, whatever the fuck you want. go home, turn off the tv and say nice things to people you love. oh, and overeat already.

my problem with the happy holidays v. merry christmas "issue" is that it's not a fucking issue at all. let's talk about what the lead headlines sh/could be in the waning days of 2005:
1. katrina victims trying to get back on their feet while the USG tries to kick them out of their hotels
2. health care health care health care
3. > 2000 people killed in iraq
4. elections in iraq
5. oh yeah, and maybe global warming being tied extreme weather events. while the u.s. blows off BOTH New Orleans and discussions of said climactic phenomenon.

mr. o'reilly, mr. limbaugh, blow me. repeatedly. and when you're done i'll wish you a happy whateverkindaholidayyouwant, motherfuckers.

12/18/2005 9:33 AM  
Blogger Jungle Cat said...

1. Katrina victims: Enough is enough, so you had some bad weather, it is time to get back to work. Vacation is over. But seriously folks, the government was never meant to be the only form of insurance for millions of people. The government should help to rebuild, but not to make whole the unfortunates. Give a man a fish . . . teach a man to fish yadda yadda yadda.

2. Health care: Life spans are getting to long now-a-days. Let the productive elite who can actually afford top notch health care pay for it. Those who society doesn't value enough to pay them enough for good health care, well we probably don't require their service past age 65.

3. Iraq: 2000 killed. Antietam 23,000 killed in a single day. Is 2000 men really that much of a sacrafice? There are over 20 million Iraqis, and if we count their future generations, there are untold more who may eventually benefit from our paltry 2000 dead. Get over it.

4.Elections in Iraq: Not much to say here actually

5. Global warming. From what I have read while the signs of global warming are certainly there, the hurricanes don't appear to be directly related, but rather there appears to be a cycle of some sort that we are entering into.

6. I'll throw in a freebie, NSA spying: Nothing wrong with it, if it protects our lives, and it can't be used for criminal prosecutions. Also, if it requires the El presidante's express approval for each person I'm ok with it. Its not like your mom is going to receive personal attention from Bush b/c she is suspected of selling crack to the neighborhood kids. You have to be involved in some heavy shit to be spied on.

I only believe half of what I say, but I think the other half is really funny.

12/18/2005 9:55 AM  
Anonymous je ne sais rien said...

Not so fast.
1. Katrina victims: Where would they work? For what money? Check out Doesn't look so enticing: poor pay, toxic conditions. Yay!

"The government wasn't supposed to be the only form of insurance" Yup, and it's not, there are private insurers. But mightn't there be a wee gap in coverage if over a hundred thousand are still displaced and fighting for economic recovery/survival?

Plus, dude, their city's like totally not there. or at least it's in the process of being rebuilt at a speed and to a degree that satisfies few who care.

2. Health care: hon, i love ya, but this don't merit a response.

3. Iraq: 2000 killed. Honestly, I don't think 2,000 is a huge number though I think antiwar activists are wise to harp on the # as it grows daily. But to compare Iraq to Antietam is ludicrous. Antietam took place in the midst of a battle for the survival of the United States as a republic; Bush himself admitted this week that in essence, Iraq and its residents posed no threat to the U.S. Last time I checked, the neocons weren't so fond of nation building. Hmmm. is it oil we're after?

4.Elections in Iraq:
Here I disagree. There is a lot to say. What does it mean for peace in the MidEast? To what degree does a seemingly democratic election reflect the growth of democracy in a previously dictatorial Iraq? Who are the candidates? Are they secular, radical, or something in between? this shit matters for the U.S.' security and strategic goals in the Middle East.

5. Global warming. Hell, I donknowsheeeit about science. But there is a lot to say. For those who know.

6. NSA spying: My mom sells crack to the neighborhood kids? Bitch - never sold any to me!

my basic point remains and you didn't refute it - there are 1 or 2 other things going on than what the clerks at Wal Mart wish their customers this fine holiday season.

12/18/2005 10:28 AM  
Blogger Mad.J.D. said...

je ne sais rien, amen brother, couldn't have said any of it better myself, especially your proposition to certain TV and radio hosts. Don't let the Cat get under your skin--he's just trying to get a rise out of people, though it's hard to tell which half of his rap is the funny half sometimes. (Cat, don't take that as an insult; I appreciate the role you fill--mostly.)

To get back to the original topic of this post: I'm no Christian (though I do love a good pagan celebration on the 25th, let's not shit ourselves) but even I know that the people who think "Happy Holidays" is an actual problem (or that's it's even remotely offensive) are so far from Christ's actual teachings that they are probably already damned to burn in their imaginary eternal hell.

Merry X-mas, bitches.

12/18/2005 11:58 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Check this out -

FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE Contact: Adam Benson or Michael Robbins
Wednesday, December 15, 2005 202/225-4071

Dingell’s HOLIDAY Jingle for O’Reilly and House GOP
Washington, DC - Congressman John D. Dingell (MI-15) recited the following poem on the floor of the US House of Representatives concerning House Resolution 579, which expressed the sense of the House of Representatives that the symbols and traditions of Christmas should be protected. “Preserving Christmas” has been a frequent topic for conservative talk show hosts, including Fox News’s Bill O’Reilly:

‘Twas the week before Christmas and all through the House

No bills were passed ‘bout which Fox News could grouse;

Tax cuts for the wealthy were passed with great cheer,

So vacations in St. Barts soon would be near;

Katrina kids were nestled all snug in motel beds,

While visions of school and home danced in their heads;

In Iraq our soldiers needed supplies and a plan,

Plus nuclear weapons were being built in Iran;

Gas prices shot up, consumer confidence fell;

Americans feared we were on a fast track to…well…

Wait--- we need a distraction--- something divisive and wily;

A fabrication straight from the mouth of O’Reilly

We can pretend that Christmas is under attack

Hold a vote to save it--- then pat ourselves on the back;

Silent Night, First Noel, Away in the Manger

Wake up Congress, they’re in no danger!

This time of year we see Christmas every where we go,

From churches, to homes, to schools, and yes…even Costco;

What we have is an attempt to divide and destroy,

When this is the season to unite us with joy

At Christmas time we’re taught to unite,

We don’t need a made-up reason to fight

So on O’Reilly, on Hannity, on Coulter, and those right wing blogs;

You should just sit back, relax…have a few egg nogs!

‘Tis the holiday season: enjoy it a pinch

With all our real problems, do we honestly need another Grinch?

So to my friends and my colleagues I say with delight,

A merry Christmas to all,

and to Bill O’Reilly…Happy Holidays.

12/18/2005 5:19 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Allow me to paraphrase the exchange above...

Comment: Blah, blah, blah, no news coverage of Katrina, blah, blah, blah.

Response: F Katrina and the horse she rode in on.

Counter-argument: But Katrina is a really big deal... [link to supposedly non-existant news coverage]


12/22/2005 5:09 PM  

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