An Open Letter to Uncle Zeb
Like the rest of the tenants of the 21st century, I rely on credit and debit cards as my primary method of legal tender. I recognize that carrying cash worked perfectly fine in the days before electricity and networking were readily accessible, but given the advances since, it seems silly to keep insisting on it. I can buy music without leaving the comfort of my home, and can pause 30 Rock while I take a bathroom break - they even have video games you can control with your brain. So why doesn't Zeb take credit card?
One reason may be the fees that credit card companies charge. A quick googlin' reveals that Visa charges 1.62% of the purchase price. So my $1.75 coffee will now cost $1.78. Boo, hiss. I'd gladly pay everyone's fees for an entire day if meant that I could use my credit card. I'd even punch a whale in the face. The convenience is worth far more than 1.62%.
But what about the amount of time? Cash is way faster, right? This may have been the case when we were forced to use those 56.6k modems, with their cacophony of dial-up sounds (I still have nightmares about those beeps), but even with the problem-riddled Berkeley network, verification takes on average (through my completely unscientific study of I-House purchases) about 10 seconds from swipe to approval. Even the most dexterous Zeb-worker would have trouble making change at those blinding speeds. And anymore, signatures aren't required on purchases under $20, so unless you're treating me to lunch (which you should), you won't have to worry about the time lost searching for a pen.
So how about it Uncle Zeb? You want to get with the times and start taking credit card? I'm not even talking about those exotic credit cards like Amex and Discover (haha, seriously, who accepts Discover?). You will make a whole slew of Boalties happy.
One reason may be the fees that credit card companies charge. A quick googlin' reveals that Visa charges 1.62% of the purchase price. So my $1.75 coffee will now cost $1.78. Boo, hiss. I'd gladly pay everyone's fees for an entire day if meant that I could use my credit card. I'd even punch a whale in the face. The convenience is worth far more than 1.62%.
But what about the amount of time? Cash is way faster, right? This may have been the case when we were forced to use those 56.6k modems, with their cacophony of dial-up sounds (I still have nightmares about those beeps), but even with the problem-riddled Berkeley network, verification takes on average (through my completely unscientific study of I-House purchases) about 10 seconds from swipe to approval. Even the most dexterous Zeb-worker would have trouble making change at those blinding speeds. And anymore, signatures aren't required on purchases under $20, so unless you're treating me to lunch (which you should), you won't have to worry about the time lost searching for a pen.
So how about it Uncle Zeb? You want to get with the times and start taking credit card? I'm not even talking about those exotic credit cards like Amex and Discover (haha, seriously, who accepts Discover?). You will make a whole slew of Boalties happy.
Labels: Technology Rants
posted by Toney at 1:26 PM
33 Comments:
Yes, but all-cash businesses enjoy significant "tax benefits."
here, here!
don't want the IRS or, ahem, la migra to start snooping
2:49 you're an asshole
Still a long way to go
at the very least how about an ATM in the law school?
BHSA could get the ATM fee! Yay!
I would actually support BHSA administering an ATM and taking a $1-2 fee for each transaction. This is something they should have been doing the last five years. Then they wouldn't have needed to think about charging us for lockers.
On top of the percentage cut, there is also usually a fixed per-transaction fee, which is usually between $.25-.50. This makes it hard for small businesses to accept credit cards for small purchases. (Adding 14%-28% to your $1.75 coffee). Large corporations have more leverage in negotiating these fees, however, which is why a place like McDonalds can get away with accepting Visa payment for your $.89 hot apple pie.
A friend of mine started a business to solve this very problem of CC fees for small businesses. Check it out: http://transfs.com/
They have better rates and lower per-transaction fees than the banks.
What Cafe Zeb should do is sell an unlimited coffee card for say 150 bucks or so. This card would allow you to drink as much coffee as you want for the entire year.
I got one of these at Bruegger's Bagels back East. For $144 I got all of the coffee, tea, and fountain drinks I wanted plus 13 bagels a month. Best deal of my life. I dream about Cafe Zeb or anywhere near the law school doing something similar.
There really outta be, at the least, an ATM machine at the law school. The closest machines are the BofA at Haas and the crappy no-name machine at I-House.
And yes, 2:49 is an ass.
There is no way credit cards are faster than cash. Period. Visa commercial to the contrary, your average pair of idiots can exchange cold, hard cash faster than the average credit card processing. This does not hold true when large sums are involved, but for small amounts and simple orders, credit cards slow things down. It sounds nice to say that technology speeds things up, but that just defies experience.
Well, maybe try getting out a little more then eh? :)
Anymore, credit cards are just a simple swipe. If you don't want your receipt, you're done. If you have something that involves more than one coin or bill in change, then by default, you're slower than credit card.
4:56, that is a sweet deal. I wish Zeb would do something like that too. It would pay for itself in like 2 months.
4:56 -
How would that work on a college campus? Wouldn't it be really easy to get coffee for multiple people with a single card?
I think credit and debit cards would also cut into the tips. Its easy for people to drop their 27 cents into the jar, but how many folks will pull out a pen to tip the counter folks a quarter? Or tell them to ring up a higher amount including a tip. It just won't happen.
I worked for eight months at a coffee shop that took credit cards. I never felt like we were under-tipped at all as a result - some people will still use cash.
(Having said that, I don't know what I would have averaged in tips had we not taken cards, nor do I know what they average at Zeb.)
Then charge people who use credit card 5% more or something. It would be interesting to know the amount of tips Zeb gets in a given day, but it's nowhere near 10%.
The point is this: I'm willing to give a little in order to be able to use a card. We can meet in the middle.
I can't believe you beat me to this rant. This really drives me crazy! I mean, what year is it? The Haas school cafe takes cards. So does EVERYWHERE ELSE ON THE PLANET. I don't believe it can be that much of a hardship if EVERYWHERE ELSE ON THE PLANET has managed to get on-board.
I'd also support at least an ATM. Don't people collect fees from ATMs? Don't some people make money that way? It's not like we have to go buy one, just find someone who has ATM machines and likes money.
10:18,
Well you would have to sign your name on the back of the card and then you were suppose to present the card with a form of ID but they never asked for the ID. I mean you can't just stand there and get 5 cups of coffee at once.
This place is a pretty major coffee/sandwich shop and they have been doing it for a number of years in cities and in college campuses so they haven't found it to be much of a problem.
The credit card issuers' agreements with retailers prohibit businesses from giving a discount for cash transactions--so either everyone would have to pay a higher price or Zeb has to eat the fees
Wait... people charge transactions fees for using credit cards ALL THE TIME. Why would this be any different? It's just that the fee would be $.05, or whatever else the overhead Zeb would need to cover would be.
Or they COULD raise everyone's prices, something that happens all the time anyway. Then they could just collect the increased prices as "tips". Of course people would bitch and moan about this, but they'd get over it when they realized that even if they eat there every single day, it will cost them $7 more per semester.
Cravath to . . . $17,500 can we discuss???
I'd just like to say that BHSA has tried to get an ATM for 3 years straight BUT the administration over in main campus won't allow it. Trust me, we've tried!
The I-House takes credit cards. No explicit extra fee. No signature required for most purposes, so it's fast. And it's only half a block away. If enough students passed up Zeb to buy at I House, you would have a credit card reader at Zeb in no time.
Isn't I-House run by the Zeb people?
Well, it's a well known fact that both are run by a secret society of the five wealthiest people in the world, known as The Pentavirate, consisting of the queen, the vatican, the gettys, the rothschilds AND colonel sanders before he went tits up, who meet tri-annually at a secret country mansion in Colorado, known as The Meadows.
Seriously though, the IHouse gets all my business, as well as that of several others, simply because they DO take credit cards.
Is there a way we could get Uncle Zeb to actually read this?
Uncle Zeb is a timeless, bodiless, omniscient being concocted of the particulate brain detritus left by decades of Boalties in the Library.
Cafe Zeb is a small corporate empire that exploits Boalties' willingness to sacrifice quality and joy for convenience.
The two are similar only in that neither will accept a credit card.
Wait, has anyone ever actually asked Uncle Zeb if he takes credit cards?
He can't "take" anything. He has no physical presence.
I don't know about that, Chaparral. I know of a gas station that openly charges different prices per gallon depending on whether you pay cash or credit. Seems like someone would have noticed it by now.
And most of the places I've seen that have a transaction fee charge $.50-$1.00 or have a minimum order of $5.00-$10.00. I don't know what the math is behind those numbers, but I don't see how Zeb would be able to charge less than every other little store, and I'm not willing to pay those premiums for a cup of coffee.
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