Good Idea?
I have a secret confession to make. I love infomercials. I even love the not-quite-an-infomercial "As Seen On TV" product ads. The products that they put out there, especially during holiday times, are, for lack of a better word, absurd. Every year there's a product that makes me scratch my head and wonder, "There can't possibly be any people dumb enough to pay a nickel for this crap. Who the hell forgets where they parked so frequently that they need a digital audio recorder to carry around? And if you're THAT forgetful, won't you just forget to record where you parked or where you left the recorder? Won't forgetful people forget to order the product? [Expletives] society!"
This year is no exception. I hereby nominate the "Loud 'N Clear" as this year's winner. The Loud 'N Clear helps the Grampa Simpsons of the world hear every word around them by "disguising" as a Blue Tooth set. That's right, it's not that grandma is as deaf as a plywood, she's just eager not to miss that important conference call about Matlock. Other nominations welcome.
This year is no exception. I hereby nominate the "Loud 'N Clear" as this year's winner. The Loud 'N Clear helps the Grampa Simpsons of the world hear every word around them by "disguising" as a Blue Tooth set. That's right, it's not that grandma is as deaf as a plywood, she's just eager not to miss that important conference call about Matlock. Other nominations welcome.
posted by Armen Adzhemyan at 11:44 PM
33 Comments:
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LOL, in the infomercial they are actually PLAYING BINGO!!!
"A must for hunters, too. Lets you hear the wildlife, before they hear you!"
Armen, this is priceless. Pure gold.
It's a cheap hearing aid disguised as a bluetooth earpiece. What's so stupid about that? A lot of people don't wear hearing aids because it makes them feel old, why not disguise it as a phone piece?
Great post, Armen. When it comes to "good idea?" products, I personally think the shenis set the bar. It's an oldie but a goodie:
http://www.metacafe.com/watch/601053/pee_like_a_man_now_you_can_with_the_shenis/
WTF are you supposed to do with the thing after you use it? Wouldn't it be all drippy? What is convenient about that?
My husband like to watch infomercials too, like the 30 minute ones that are on at 2 in the morning - drives me crazy. But I have to say that I LOVE the sham-wow towel. That commercial actually nearly convinced me that I need to pay $19.95 for a towel.
Nooooooooooooo! I can't believe someone beat me to posting about the sham-wow. Never before have I loved a product so much. Two of the large sham-wows and one medium sham-wow can soak up an entire swimming pool! And they are washing machine friendly.
But if you washed it, wouldn't it soak up all the water in the washing machine?
Nothing compares to the snuggie.
http://www.infomercial-hell.com/blog/2008/09/16/snuggie-blanket-with-sleeves-another-candidate-for-the-stupid-products-hall-of-fame/
A blanket with sleeves? Everyone on the infomercial looks like they belong in one of the new star wars movies.
Armen, as a proud graduate of Barbri, I got the reference in the title (even if the current Boalties didn't). Just wanted to say I appreciated it - I can still hear his voice.
The best part of the Sham-wow commercial is how he is a squinty carny who will knife your in the kidneys for a quid.
I am still laughing at the Shenis.
This thread is pure gold. Dangerous though, as I'm tempted to try to find something that one-ups the Shenis rather than study for impending exams.
Probably wouldn't be able to anyway.
It's useful, because old people like to play bingo! And young people like to eavesdrop on their neighbor's gossip!
The Snuggies commercial is really fun, if you imagine that everyone is a member of a millennial cult.
I couldn't live without the Milkmaster 2000. "Now I can have milk every day!"
"Super Bass-o-matic '76."
"Super Bass-o-matic '76."
I know it's a commercial (instead of an infomercial), but it's so funny it hurts.
Taco-town.
Pizza? That's what I call a taco!
I don't know about the Snuggie, but if it's anything like the Slanket, I have to differ with Mike. I LOVE my Slanket. It is so much better than a regular blanket. I can't be the only person who finds that a blanket on your lap doesn't keep your arms warm, and if you have a blanket over your arms you can't hold a book or a laptop. What's wrong with a blanket with sleeves solving that problem? I've bought many Slankets to give as gifts too, and the recipients are always pleased. I never thought about how dumb I'd look walking around in it because I don't think I ever have walked around in it. Even if I did look dumb, at least I'd be warm.
Oh, and I forget if it's an infomercial or just a commercial, but the ones that were on at 2AM about giving up city life to become an alpaca farmer and the joys of alpacas were my favorites.
Jenna, I can't figure out if you're serious or just making fun of the commercial. You used the exact same justification as the commercial (can't read book without your arms getting cold, umm buy a sweatshirt). Thanks for introducing me to Slanket though. That name is so much better than Snuggie.
And one more thing. Please read this Slanketeering (aka Slanket testimonial) excerpt:
My boyfriend and I have been talking about getting Slankets for weeks, but hadn't yet bought them. I came home on Saturday, and he said he got us early Valentine's Day presents- Slankets! He had his on, and gave me mine. Turns out, he had had his mother sew pockets into mine, and inside the pocket was an engagement ring... He asked, and I said yes! Proposal via Slanket... what could be better?!
Mad props to 9:46am. You pose an interesting query.
Mike--I'm serious. I've never heard of the Snuggie or seen a commercial/infomercial for it. I think I saw an ad for the Slanket online and asked for it for Christmas two years ago. It really is fabulous. I live in Oakland; you're more than welcome to come over and try it to experience its awesomeness. That is, if you can pry it off my husband who has pretty much stolen it from me. He's getting one for Christmas this year.
Jenna, I love you, but WEAR A F*CKING SWEATER. A blanket with sleeves? WTF?
The shenis strikes me as another retarded idea. When the guy talks up the fact that it's made in Germany I roll my eyes in anger. Yes, the pride of German engineering...a rag!
But nothing can top the body blade. (See here for instructional video, though I can't find the original infomercial). Now, the infomercial touted the "hundreds of micro-oscillations per second and its "space-age material." It's a piece of plastic. You're shaking a piece of a plastic.
I meant the sham-wow.
If there was an award for selling useless as-seen-on-tv products, Billy Mays would win it every year.
Note that Mays has even taken on the sham-wow market with the Zorbeez.
My favorite though is Mighty Putty. How long will it be before some idiot Mighty Putties his hands (or something worse) together?
Whatever Armen. You know my closet with its sweaters is far away from my sofa. My slanket is right there. If I want to use a blanket that keeps my whole body, rather than just my torso and legs warm, who are you to criticize? But Wait! There's More! The slanket is a good idea and it actually does what it promises, unlike most other infomercial products.
Wait -- are you guys serious about the sham-wow towels, because I really really want one! Please advise.
Don't wait even one more second. Buy one. And buy one for everyone you know and love.
Sham-wow = most beautiful product ever.
To paraphrase Missy Elliot, take Toney's comment and just "flip and reverse it." It's a rag!!!
Little late, but NOTHING beats this one (possibly NSFW):
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fa36dX_ICFQ
I think this says it all.
Nice post Armen..
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