Sunday, March 14, 2010

Down the Rabbit Hole

I came to school today to pick up some books, preparing for another relaxing Sunday evening of Con Law at the laundromat (complete with the music stylings of Kenny G, of course). Sunday at the law school being much like a mortuary when the morticians go on strike, imagine my surprise when something suddenly came flying at my face out of nowhere.

Literally flying.

Somehow, a tiny bird had gotten into the building and was flying around the east wing, trying to find a way back out into the courtyard. (As an aside: you know you're living in a construction zone when there are enough gaping holes in the building for wildlife to find a way through - I'm hoping next time it's a donkey that I can ride up and down the stairs to the 3rd floor.)

I dunno, maybe I wasn't quite ready to get my Downy-and-Constitutional-Gender-Issues on quite yet, so I approached the little guy. He landed on the floor and started hopping around in the most enticing way... I got even closer, thinking that maybe I could corral him over to one of the doors and set him free.

But he had ideas of his own. He maneuvered deftly around me and starting hopping off toward Zeb. Of course, I followed. He hopped past Zeb, and into the hallway that leads to the CDO office and bookstore. This is too good, I thought. And then he hopped right up to the door of the CDO office, turned around, and plaintively cocked his head at me. Is the term "CDO office" redundant? Perhaps. But I swear that bird looked like he expected to be let in.

Mad hatters came to mind (for many reasons) and I quickly backed off. But as I hefted my books back to the car, I couldn't help thinking about the advice that little bird might get if he finds a way in: "When you're asked about your hobbies, poop once for golf. Twice for writing fan-fiction SCOTUS opinions. Screech loudly, as though you're about to be eaten, for falconry or if they ask you what your plans are for the next 10 years..."

Alas, I will never know. I chickened out. Or should I say sparrowed-out? Anything is possible the week WOA briefs are due.


Blogger William said...

"It's a bird!"
"I know it's a bird. I'm on the phone!"
"It walked on my pillow!"

3/15/2010 8:13 AM  
Blogger Dan said...

Question: if that bird had entered the CDO office and hear his job prospects, would he have lost the will to fly?

3/15/2010 12:53 PM  
Blogger Dan said...


3/15/2010 12:53 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...


3/15/2010 1:50 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

FACT: That bird's job prospects are better than Utah State's prospects for winning the tourny.

3/15/2010 2:55 PM  
Blogger Dan said...

This comment has been removed by the author.

3/15/2010 3:24 PM  
Blogger Dan said...

Hahaha. The Aggies are riding high off the euphoria of being selected! But yeah, they haven't won a first found game in as long as I can remember. Luckily, making the tournament and getting blown out in Game 1 is more than enough to satisfy the sad, lonely, and frozen residents of Logan, Utah. God bless 'em.

3/15/2010 3:45 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I had a disturbing encounter with a squirrel last spring in the open courtyard that required assistance from UCPD lest the poor thing beat it self brainless against the glass windows.

3/15/2010 7:33 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

... you called the police because a squirrel was running into a window? It's a rat with a fluffy tail. Let it die. How about saving police resources for the times they are needed (e.g. quelling idiotic student riots)

3/16/2010 8:01 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

no, i called the police because squirrels can have rabies and having a squirrel (or other wild animal with teeth) running around an enclosed space in apparent hysteria could result in a student being bitten.

3/16/2010 11:21 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

good. i approve then (since you clearly cared)

3/16/2010 11:31 AM  

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